02.25.06
Posted in AV 2005-06 at 10:40 am by osavolor
People usually say that when you volunteer, you get back more than you put in. Well, over the past 6 months, this statement could not have been more true. I feel that I have constantly just been receiving and barely giving. Every day is a new challenge, but what I come away with at the end if it is always amazing. I cherish the conversations that the residents trust me to have with them. One young man asked me, “Before you worked here, did you know that people like me existed?” I had no idea what the appropriate response to that would be without sounding like I grew up in their neighborhood, so I just said, “Of course.” He gave me a look as if to say, “Yeah right, you don’t have to lie.” Another enlightening moment occurred when one of the male residents was refusing to get dressed up in order to go job searching. One of the staff members, who happened to be black, said to him, “Well I’m sorry to say it, but because you’re a black man you’re going to have to get more dressed up than that polo shirt.” He looked at her, and then went to his room to get changed. It’s been moments like these that are constantly forcing me to grow.
My most unforgettable and favorite resident so far was a twenty year-old girl who has had many obstacles in her life including mental health issues, HIV, hardly any real family support, no job - never mind the skills to obtain one, and a past that would haunt anyone. However, the most important thing that she had was the will to be better. This girl was my first case; she was assigned to me only six days after I arrived at my work site. She stayed at the shelter from early September until January. Unfortunately, she is not at the housing program that we had set up for her. Instead, she is in jail for a foolish, though serious mistake that happened a few years ago. We had many conversations about it and I thought that it had been resolved, but obviously it wasn’t. This story was one of hope, failure, love and betrayal; nearly every emotion and experience wrapped into one young, scared and brave girl. She has been through more in her twenty years than some people will read about in their whole life. Among other things, she taught me that when no one else is on your side, that is still no reason to give up. That your past does not define you, every day is a new chance for improvement and change.
Along with growing from experiences at work, I have also grown in many ways thanks to my community. Lisa and Meg have challenged me to think differently about everything from my religious beliefs to being afraid of the dark. They constantly encourage me to do my best and when I feel like I’ve fell short, they never let me get down. Like the conversations with the residents, I also truly cherish the conversations that we have had and look very much forward to the rest of the time that we have here in Philly.
The past six months have gone by a little too fast, so the best I can do is live the next four to the fullest. I’m still not really sure about what my plans are for the future, but what I do know is that I will take everything that I have learned, felt, been a part of, hated and loved during this year, with me wherever I go.
Thanks for all of your prayers, you’re always in mine!
Love, Sarah
Sarah Cleveland - Philadelphia
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02.16.06
Posted in AV 2005-06 at 10:42 am by osavolor
“What we learn with pleasure, we never forget.” -Alfred Mercerf
“He be beastin’ on my chips Miss Jackie,” and with only that being said, I turned around to watch Adonis wind up and punch Jean Carlos across the face. It was a typical day of after school with the 5th and 6th graders here at the St. Rita’s Immigration Center in the Bronx. I quickly attended to the small pool of blood forming inside of Jean Carlos’ mouth while I desperately attempted to hold myself back from gagging.
“Why did you have to punch him?” I asked Adonis once the mess was over. “He was beastin’ on my chips so I had to snuff him. My mom says you don’t stay with a hit on you, you have to hit back.” To be honest, sometimes I feel like I need a dictionary for some of the phrases that come out of the kids’ mouths here. Once one of the kids told me I was sick. I said I was actually feeling quite well. Laughter erupted loudly throughout the room because “sick” is a good thing.
Every day I have a “Question of the Day.” Through some creative answers, I have learned that pets are better to have on Valentine’s Day than girlfriends and that the ideal job in life is a crocodile hunter. We have celebrations for everyone’s birthday and have regular dance parties. An after school dance party is comparable to that groundhog game that can be played at carnivals. The kids will jump up on their chairs and as they tell me, “Work on their moves” as I frantically try to get them to sit down before anyone walks by. I try to add in some fun educational things to the days also. We have contests of labeling the fifty states. Believe it or not, the most difficult state for the kids to identify is Alaska.
During after school yesterday, Adonis offered me one of his Doritos. Then after swallowing he began laughing hysterically at me. “You hate spicy food Miss Jackie and I just gave you a spicy Dorito. I got you. I got you. You tease me and joke around all the time. Now I finally got you back.” My eyes began welling up with tears, partly because of the small fire that had ignited on my tongue, but also because after all of the struggles the two of us have had with each other we were able to finally joke around.
Of course in the midst of all fun times, I learn about how some students never got any Christmas presents or how the police came by their apartment last night because their neighbor was selling drugs. I have a feeling of helplessness when I hear these stories. There is something different about these kids. They have to witness so much more than I ever did at their age. Maybe that is why we all goof around during those afternoons. It helps them unwind from a busy day at school and it helps me feel something more for those kids instead of sympathy. It amazes me at times how they are still able to laugh and joke around with each other when they live in the area that they do. The kids don’t know life to be any different. Someone once said, “You just do what you can do and hopefully that will be enough.” With that being said, this afternoon there are sure to be more jokes and of course some dance moves.
“Humor is, in fact, a prelude to faith, and laughter is the beginning of prayer.” -Reinhold Niebuhr
Lots of Love,
Jackie
Jackie Johns - Bronx
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